Updated: Jun 5, 2019
They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel- Carl W. Buechner.
I started with a quote because words have power.
When talking to others, words will affect people because of the association that may have a deeper meaning, the words can become internal picture’s which in turn then can become an idea (good or bad) which can become a belief (good or limiting) and in turn can then effect a behaviour.
Words can facilitate or hinder our abilities.
You are only as good as you think you are!
Of all the people you interact with on a daily basis, the most important person you will talk with is yourself.
This isn’t always necessarily large sentence’s of dialogue but a mixture of word’s, picture’s and fleeting thought’s.
Psychologist’s and neuroscientist’s have established that we maintain an ongoing internal dialogue of around 150-300 words per minute, approximately 45000-51000 words a day!
The majority of this talk is around daily mundane things “what shall I eat tonight.......”I wonder what the weather is going to be like......” what’s on t.v later” etc etc, but it’s when the dialogue becomes more serious, “I am useless”.......”I will never be able to do it”..........”I always mess this up.”
Here is where the problems can start, the negative dialogue start‘s spiralling downwards and unless the cycle gets broken it can be reinforced time after time, brick by brick, becoming a self fulfilling prophecy resulting in the creation of a limiting belief which in turn will affect our behaviour.
More research has shown that positive to negative comments should be a ratio of 5:1 for a relationship to have longevity and be a healthy one, with that in mind it is important not to let people speak to you badly but more importantly not to speak to yourself in a bad way.
If truth be told, i’m not unrealistic in thinking that we will all take this on board and always be nice to ourselves because crap happens and at times our thoughts control us rather than us controlling them.
By being aware and taking charge of our internal dialogue we can respond better to certain situations, we can perform to a higher level or move from our current one, whether in life, sport or work!
It is important to take charge when we need to.
Never be afraid to challenge yourself if you do not like what you are saying.
It can take time but the more you work at something the easier it will become until it becomes habitual.
Start today, be mindful of how you talk to yourself.
The massive impact of changing even one negative into a positive can completely change your outlook for the better.
Relationships (including your own), will improve.
Something so simple as talking productively and positive to yourself can be the catalyst to getting what you want out of life.
Everything start’s with a thought, make sure it’s a good one.
You are the most important person you know, talk to yourself like you would any other human being!
As an accredited sport’s performance and personal development coach based in Highworth near Swindon, I help people on a daily basis, to learn how to best communicate with themselves and other’s, enabling them to get the results they want and changing the one’s they don‘t.